Yes, an American knows his roots and on holidays may even hang two flags in front of his house, for example, his "native" Irish and American. But both a Chinese, a Russian-speaking Jew, and an Irishman must equally follow rules of behavior alien to their nature and forget "native" taboos or liberties. Otherwise, American society will reject them, and they will be forced to return to Brighton, Harlem, Chinatown. Many emigrants from our countries, even after ten years of life in America, cannot fully integrate into society.
Meanwhile, adopting the principles of American life, merging with society and becoming a "face of American nationality" is not very difficult.
WORK IN AMERICA IS A MATTER OF HONOR, GLORY, VALOR AND HEROISM
The average American is "on fire" at work. He arrives half an hour to an hour early and leaves an hour or two late. Working "from bell to bell" is bad form; such employees are the first to be fired. The firing itself is simple: the boss asks you to step in for a minute, thanks you for your work, and hands you an envelope with a farewell check, a reference letter, a written thank-you (there may be many papers; in America, paper is not spared). The boss in America is an all-powerful feudal lord; you cannot forget about him for a minute.
The main thing valued in an employee, besides professionalism, is loyalty to the company, to the boss, sycophancy (there is no upper limit; if you don't want to lose your dignity, quit). But! Insulting subordinates is not customary. Male bosses are especially polite to women; in recent years, feminists have won many lawsuits about sexual harassment at work, with harassment considered any touching, winking, or even frequent calls to the office.
An American values actual time worked – that is, he does not slack off at work, does not read newspapers, does not engage in extraneous conversations. There are known companies where there are no smoke breaks – smokers are not hired.
Competitiveness in large companies simply drives people crazy. It is not surprising that many need psychological help. And companies, saving money on future doctors, immediately hire a psychologist with a phone number that all employees can call for free and immediately receive emergency psychological help.
Americans love to "snitch." If they notice something wrong, they run to the police, write complaints to the authorities. But in everyday life, they most often snitch on the boss at work; it's something of a national pastime here. For example, colleagues went for a smoke. The first smoked one cigarette, the second lit another without a pause. Needless to say, the boss fired the scoundrel on a colleague's tip.
At work, it's best not to stand out. Yes, a good employee's salary is regularly increased. But having reached a certain ceiling, the "star" may lose his job: after another raise, it suddenly turns out that keeping him is no longer profitable – it's better to hire a newcomer, even if unskilled. So the stress-filled days drag on: stand out – the boss won't like it, he'll fire you; don't stand out – your career won't take off, you'll also be fired.
Therefore, the average American is constantly looking for work. Even after receiving thanks from the boss, a promotion, or some other recognition, the American comes home, picks up a thick newspaper with ads, and, after clicking on appealing addresses on the computer, sends out resumes by email.
Writing a resume is the first thing an emigrant learns. There are even special three-day courses on how to write a resume, how to praise your existing and non-existent abilities, how to present your biography in the best light. And courses that teach manners during job interviews are already designed for a week or even a month. Appearance, clothing, answers to HR questions (never look at the floor or in the eyes – only at the middle of the interlocutor's forehead!) – a whole science, many volumes have been written on this topic.
An American must be proud of his work. Work in America is a matter of honor, glory, valor and heroism (this aphorism was born in our country, but indeed, you couldn't say it better). Both a postman, a construction steeplejack, and a Playboy strip model can convincingly tell how they love their work. An American is desperately immodest at work – he shows off, he works for show, and always overacts a little. A policeman also plays the policeman, a salesman plays the master of the counter, a driver plays the artist of the wheel: thus they prove their sincere striving for the ideal.
Therefore, the sure way to become like an American is to play an American, to imagine yourself on a film set. Action! The extras start... Ahead – the rest of your life. You've come to America – play American until you die.
THE PRIVATE LIFE OF AN AMERICAN
"Privacy" is a frequent word in an American's vocabulary. Privacy is personal life, that which is inaccessible to outsiders. An American will put his feet on a common table (it's comfortable for him), but will never inquire about someone else's salary, will never show that he is sour and unlucky in life, and will not comfort another without a special invitation. By and large, no one here loves anyone or sympathizes with anyone except themselves. But external decencies, when you're not used to them, have a depressing effect on our people. Even in words, Americans, as they say here, are "politically correct." For example, a Negro is not a Negro but an "African-American," a disabled person is not disabled but a person "who has suffered an accident," a psycho is not a psycho but a person "with mental problems."
At the slightest touch, an American apologizes, so a tourist sometimes only realizes after the apology that he was touched. A minimum distance between interlocutors or passersby is strictly maintained – half a meter. If you come closer and, heaven forbid, take a friend by the hand, it will be misinterpreted.
An American is full of self-esteem; he is a stoic and acts according to the proverb "no strength of spirit, no glory" – a striking contrast to the pitying Slavism. Crying on a friend's shoulder is not accepted here. If you complain, you are a weakling, spent material.
Mistakes in violating privacy are severely punished. A typical example: an employee of a company accidentally found out that his colleague got a raise. At an inopportune moment in the smoking room, the colleague asked for advice on what original gift to give his mother-in-law, but within thirty bucks. "Why are you being stingy?" the privacy violator was surprised, "You got a raise, didn't you?!" And he was fired the next day – the offended colleague snitched.
Even a lingering gaze on the street can be perceived as a violation of taboo. While observing the Broadway crowd, I myself was called a "lousy Spaniard" for such a violation (people of Caucasian nationality in New York are still mistaken for Latin Americans, which allows relatively safe movement around the city at night – even blacks are afraid of Latinos).