Cinema and Germans, Americans, etc.
In Soviet times we experienced an information famine: we pounced on Hollywood blockbusters as if they were exotic fruits; we envied foreign viewers who had the right to choose any film and video product. We were raised on Cheburashka, but Mickey Mouse was something special. We had access to the show "Visiting a Fairy Tale," but the films of our childhood like "Fantômas" or "Zorro" were a real sensation.
Soviet fairy-tale films seemed bland and did not frighten children at all. And in order to watch the screen adaptation of Gogol's "Viy," one had to be at least 14 years old. "Communist" children also felt the need to tickle their nerves, and so they told each other scary stories about a red thread or a gray spot, about vampires and wood goblins. And the most hit epic blockbuster was, of course, "The Black Hand." Still, horror did not pour into unprotected children's brains from the screens of televisions and movie theaters. Now in any action movie, the concentration of coolness in the ways of solving problems and the harshness of methods for getting out of a situation is simply record-breaking.
Did we win or lose because the Iron Curtain so zealously guarded our mental virginity? It is hard to answer unequivocally; and yet it seems to me that the changes did not occur for the better. At any rate, regarding the content of the TV airwaves and the programming policy of the channels.
Examples? Please! Like all children, coming home from school, my child turns on the TV, consuming along with lunch the appetizer of the children's TV block. At one time I forbade her to watch one imported animated series in the morning block of a domestic TV channel. It was a complete surprise to me that a children's program is unfit for viewing by those for whom it is primarily intended. The reason is its plot. The heroes of the cartoon are characters from computer games, waging war in an adult way, that is, with slaughter, bloody wounds, and incredible cruelty in the absence of serious grounds for antagonism.
Soon it turned out that such a "poor in form and content" sheep had wandered into our broadcast herd not alone. Now on TV, eight out of ten pictures are brawls with gunplay. In far from nighttime hours, a child can stumble upon a non-explicit but sexual scene.
Remember the reaction of the little fairy-tale princess upon being read the kind little verses "a monster of terrible appearance seized the beautiful princess..."? That's right, the movie child wept bitterly. When such little stories appear daily on the air with all the accompanying sound effects, music, and screams—what can be expected from a child who has watched a lot of this filth? That's right, nervous instability. So we are reaping the fruits of pragmatism in the form of zombified teenagers with glassy eyes and brass knuckles in their pockets. These guys are not to blame for being that way. It is we, the adults, who raised them as mindless consumers...
Today's children are more informed compared to their peers of twenty years ago, but by no means does any information contribute to the formation of a mentally healthy child. The child's mind is uncritical; it takes much literally. And if we, adults, can evaluate violence on screen from the point of view of the film's concept, the director's aesthetics, or the format of the genre, then the child draws much simpler conclusions. Namely: the strong man is always right, enemies must be physically eliminated, and vampires and other evil spirits really exist, since they are hunted by the living and beautiful FBI agents Mulder and Scully or the excellent student Buffy.
I will not claim that only America is to blame for the generation of cruelty on screen. I will even pretend not to know the phrase "it's all Hollywood tricks," but what about the Disneys and the Brothers? If their products openly employ violence and sadism in the most childish product—animation. "Tom and Jerry," a classic animated series for many generations, was launched in the early 1950s. It has high-quality animation, but everything else is meanness, treachery, and the glorification of solving problems by force. Sadism among little animals is inevitably extrapolated by children who watch these very not-untalented cartoons to real relationships.
Perhaps it is precisely for this reason that the Japanese bought the cartoon about Cheburashka, calling it the Russian Pokemon. And in Israel, the screening of bloodletting films is preceded by an announcement that, in a loose translation into Russian, sounds like: "We earnestly ask you to take your children away from our blue screens in order to avoid stress." In European and American movie theaters, children are given morning time with appropriate films at a ticket price half that of an adult show. And our movie theaters are still at the stage of technical re-equipment; not many have bothered about "raising a new generation of viewers."
Western Europeans and Americans honor and protect the psyche of their children. And our offspring are our own concern. It turns out that over the last fifteen years, the "picture of film distribution" has changed to exactly the opposite. Look, in time we too, when the thunder strikes, the peasant father will cross himself before the TV screen. And it would not hurt to have a legislative roasted rooster that would peck the distributor in his... film library.
Whatever a child delights in, as long as his rights are not infringed
Tragedies - because our ways of solving family problems often seem monstrous to foreigners and completely unacceptable from the point of view of a civilized person.
How many of our fellow citizens are familiar with the international convention on the rights of the child? Hardly any. Instead, we often boast of a supposedly higher level of spiritual development and the very, very erudition. They read no less, but they know more about children's rights and allow children a lot. And they put up with a toddler's tantrum in a supermarket, demanding to buy him ice cream: the mother will long persuade the child rolling on the floor and vilely squealing to get up and continue moving. Hit? No way! Otherwise the mother would be in for a long stretch and a hefty fine.
They believe that the more freedom a child has in his actions, the freer and more independent the adult that grows out of him will be. In fact, this approach leads to the fact that these children very painfully transition into actual adult life, and real difficulties are overcome by them much harder than by people from the former Soviet Union. And faced with real violence, and even in the absence of police, foreigners are at a loss. In general, the proverb "for one beaten, two unbeatens are given" did not appear for nothing.
Many traditions and habits that are quite natural for them cause extreme surprise among our fellow citizens. For example, for a long time the sight of six- or seven-year-old oafs being pushed around the city in strollers gave me more than mixed feelings. At first you are filled with sympathy: like, poor child, his legs are crippled. However, after a couple of minutes the little one jumps out of the cart and with the war cry of the Sioux Indians rushes on his perfectly healthy two legs to a display case filled with toys. Moreover, the little one is dressed in shorts studded with cute little animals, under which disposable diapers show white. But that's how they, the bourgeois, do it. Ours cannot understand. CIS children by the age of seven have long been able to take care of themselves, and there is nothing to say about Pampers and Huggies - they don't wear them. No need.
In Israel, Israelis themselves joke that a child takes off his diaper when he picks up a rifle, that is, at eighteen. But - every coin has two sides. Not a single internet toy store or shop will offer a single trinket directly or indirectly related to war or violence. Dolls, bears, spades with little scoops, all sorts of cars and construction sets - as much as you want. A plastic rifle or pistol can be found with great difficulty at flea markets. A people that has been forced to fight since the founding of its state does not want children to be imbued with the spirit of war from diapers.
An example. A sad one. A certain Leva, together with his family, repatriated to Israel from Ukraine. He was born and raised in a small town on the Black Sea coast and was a classic type of Black Sea Jew. Huge, over two meters tall, baked from childhood by the southern sun, noisy, hardworking, a little naive, amusingly embarrassed by this naivety and - incredibly kind (like any big and strong person). All conversations with Leva invariably came down to the fact that "if it weren't for the children, I wouldn't have gone anywhere." Leva and his wife worked several jobs. More precisely, they worked like slaves, because they set a goal to give their children a decent education abroad. The children studied well but were very spoiled. Once Leva, in his heart, slapped his parental palm on the plump educational place of his youngest, who had not done some homework. The youngest, for the sake of appearances, cried bitterly for about a minute and a half, after which the family had dinner and calmly went to bed.
In the morning, an Israeli neighbor asked the girl why she had been screaming the other day. And the unreasonable child, for whom the father's methods of upbringing were completely normal, blurted out: "It was daddy who hit me." The neighbor immediately, out of her civic integrity, "ratted" to the police.
The child did not return home from school. By evening, Leva had run around the whole city and, usually dark-skinned, became white as death. The fact is that the favorite method of Palestinian fedayeen in fighting Israelis is the destruction of women and children. Terrorists are afraid to mess with soldiers - they might shoot them... In short, already at night it turned out that Leva's offspring had been taken directly from school by the family violence service and placed in a closed boarding school, where parents have no access. Leva was put on file with the police, a huge fine was extracted from him, and the child was allowed to be seen only in the second week. At the meeting they sobbed, the girl really wanted to go home, but she was not let go. Leva himself from black-haired became almost completely gray. And he did not go to prison only because there were no witnesses to his "beating" of his child.
When we last saw each other, he told me that the girl would soon be released back to the family, and at a family council they decided - the children and his wife are returning to Ukraine. He stays to work and will send them money. "How good that we didn't manage to get Israeli citizenship!" said Leva.
Generally speaking, there is nothing to reproach the Israelis with - simply those methods of raising the younger generation that Leva applied are not used in the West. And in a clash of mentalities, the police usually wins.
The police are also very useful in the face of the threat of kidnapping, which parents and educators are very afraid of. Parents themselves bring children to school and pick them up until they are 12. Even in the shabbiest college there is a specially trained doorkeeper whose task is to hand the kids personally to the parents. He simply must know both by sight. He can calmly watch as schoolchildren walk on their heads or tear those heads off each other, but he will not give a single hooligan to an outsider.
However, I would put in first place among the differences in upbringing between their and our children the higher standard of living of the "indigenous bourgeois," or more precisely, the higher quality of life. Young people get an education, find a job, build a career, arrange housing, and only then start a family with a planned child. Hence the opportunity to devote oneself entirely to one's heir in a financially foreseeable future.
Family and school
Let us toss the coin once more, for it has many sides—oh, so many. The former minister of education of Israel, in response to a remark by a journalist from a Russian-language newspaper, "Your children cannot read until the fifth grade," without a moment's hesitation declared: "That is not necessary. The main thing is that they absorb the spirit of democracy inherent in our society."
Since one spirit is clearly not enough for admission to university, the Russian-speaking community, as soon as it gets on its feet and becomes a little settled in the host country, first of all creates a network of its own schools. There, along with the spirit, children absorb the study of mathematics, languages, and various other sciences. And since a considerable number of professional teachers live in emigration in European countries and America, such schools quickly become prestigious. And over time, many natives bring their offspring there.
The same is true of kindergartens. State and municipal kindergartens generally work until one o'clock in the afternoon. But whether you work, whether you have the time and opportunity to pick up the child, what you will do with him and where to drag him, no one cares. There are two options: either hire a nanny, which will take all your hard-earned money, or pool resources to open your own kindergarten with beds. Because a municipal kindergarten in Israel uses mattresses thrown on the concrete floor as sleeping places for children. In summer that is still fine. But in winter it is cold even in the Middle East.
In Europe, by contrast, emigrant parents try to place their offspring in native-language kindergartens. That is logical, since a child easily absorbs the language and habits of the country of residence (one is tempted to pun: strange habits). And soon the boy Vasya can no longer be distinguished from the boy Hans—the same pronunciation, the same gestures, the same inevitable chewing gum from morning to night. My friend took her child to a private kindergarten in Germany. And she was quite surprised that a two-year-old boy had to take an exam. Fortunately, he passed it successfully. Then the teachers demanded that one of the parents come and stay with the child for the first while. By the way, the father of the aforementioned boy got so involved in attending the kindergarten that he abandoned his business for a while. My friend had to shoulder not only two male children, one of whom was her own husband, but also the family firm. However, as a result of kindergarten upbringing, her beloved happily tinkers with his son at home instead of staring at the TV immediately upon returning from the office.
After some time abroad, one begins to notice curious and highly instructive details concerning attitudes toward children. The first impression is that there are far more children with Down syndrome abroad. In fact, the percentage is about the same. It is simply that such children are considered full members of society there; they are worked with, parents love them as they are, and no one locks poor sick children away in special institutions, out of sight. And for the social adaptation of children with genetic defects there are a great many programs—both state-funded and financed by private charitable foundations.
In Western countries it is perfectly normal to address a child respectfully: "Mister so-and-so." The attitude may be ironic, but in no case dismissive. "What does the little gentleman wish?" a five-year-old child will be asked in a shop or cafe without a shadow of a smile. You will agree that if from childhood you see a personality, a person in a child, he will behave accordingly and in adult life will treat his juniors with the same respect.
And as for praising a child for anything—people in prosperous countries simply consider it their duty. The object of praise may be a nice little suit or a chewing gum wrapper thrown into the bin according to the rules. Or the presence of a cute little face with intelligent eyes. You lose nothing, the child is pleased, and the mother simply beams with a smile. But even here there are curiosities.
My friend, a beautiful, fair-haired Jewish woman, was walking with her equally blond little boy in none other than Düsseldorf, in North Rhine-Westphalia. Since Marina had sent her Mishka to a German kindergarten, she tried to speak to him in German. So they are chatting, and behind them walk two sweet little old ladies. And one of them, looking at Mishka, says quietly to her friend: "Look, Anchen, there really are still true Aryans!" Mishka—a smart little boy!—pulled his mother's hand toward him and whispered in her ear, asking who Aryans were. "German Jews," Marina squeezed out through the laughter that was breaking through.
For a long time we called ourselves the most reading nation. Actually, other nations love the printed word no less. It's just that under the Soviet Union books cost several orders of magnitude cheaper than abroad - that's the answer to the question why we were "reading" and they were not. Abroad, having an average-sized home library (400-500 volumes) is an indicator of a family's well-being. Reference literature, textbooks, and study guides are an expensive pleasure. And children's books are not cheap either. Producers of books for toddlers sometimes go to such lengths to boost sales - you marvel. Once in Israel, at a Russian bookstore, I decided to buy a gift for a friend's little child. There were so many bright books on the shelf - my eyes widened. My attention was drawn to two completely identical books standing side by side, but differing in price by two orders of magnitude. Suspecting some Jewish cunning here, I turned to the saleswoman for clarification. "One of them is edible," she said. It turns out that some publisher, having mastered the production of Russian-language literature for children, in order to attract buyers even more, issues accordion-style books that can be eaten after reading (or during it). Truly, "science nourishes young men."
I happened to study in Spain - at a language school for foreign students. I don't claim any generalizations, but a certain trend was noticeable. There were 55 people in our group. The highest academic performance with great diligence was among the Germans and British. Still, we Slavs grasped the material fastest. But the Poles, and the Russians and Ukrainians, were bored in classes, it was hard for them to bear the cross of discipline; they had the most truancy, and only this tribe had the habit of cheating.
Malaysia, India, and the Philippines (with excellent attendance) lagged at the very bottom of academic performance. The Chinese and Koreans did a little better. All of them were like C students (here it would be honest to take into account the language difficulty compared to Europeans), but these people can be proud of docile, obedient, and diligent students. I must note that even in emigration, the Chinese allow themselves the luxury of leaving their wives at home, providing for the family on their own. But as for studies, they study on equal terms. The Americans and Canadians were considered good students: they didn't fall behind in the curriculum, but didn't take on more, didn't ask the professor additional questions. Such students can be immediately recognized in class by their feet pulled up onto the chair and by ever-present cups of coffee, tea, or a bottle of water.
So we grouped ourselves in the class: into small factions by level of knowledge and work attitude. I warmed up between the Finns and Germans, always competent, friendly, and never intrusive.
Vocational school at university
When I first arrived at the university where I was to work for Spanish science, I was struck by the external "underdevelopment" of the local students. In my opinion, they did not at all measure up to the level of university students. The locals explained the situation this way: in recent years, unemployment in Spain has risen, including hidden unemployment. The government is not able to provide jobs for everyone, especially unskilled youth. So they keep them within the walls of the university for three years, giving them a program of roughly our vocational school level. It is precisely "keep" because these immature youngsters show no particular desire for knowledge. The main thing is that they don't hang around the streets and don't spoil unemployment statistics. Teenagers honestly attend classes, follow fashion, eat at the university cafeteria at discounted rates, ride public transport at half price with student IDs. And only a few of them continue their studies seriously.
Another detail immediately caught my eye: democracy in relations between teachers and students. Students greet almost everyone with an unchanging kiss and hug, except perhaps the dean and the rector. They more often and more freely discuss personal problems with teachers, share impressions of football matches, and so on.
I kindly envied the professoriate, for whom working there is a pleasure. A specialist teaches only two or three months a year, and the rest of the time they do research. At that, the salary is paid steadily - 1,500-2,000 euros, plus a host of accompanying "perks" like meals, transport, bonuses. The higher the academic degree of a teacher, the fewer hours and the narrower the specialization. However, in my opinion, for Spaniards, compared to our system of higher education and scientific institutions, becoming such a luminary, when the state appreciates and adequately pays for your brains, is much more difficult and longer.
Students and researchers are also not deprived by the state. Premises, libraries, office equipment - all top-notch. Work - as much as you like! Technical means are constantly updated, everything is state-of-the-art. But I was tormented by a persistent thought: "Why does a goat need an accordion?" Let me explain. I worked in the laboratory of the computer engineering department. For a dozen students, half a dozen researchers, and the same number of teachers - their supervisors - there were eight personal computers and four silicon graphics workstations. These workstations cost $10-15 thousand each. Only one student, and even then a foreigner, was gnawing at science using it, diligently tormenting graphic editors. The rest of the workstations served as ordinary user "machines": to surf the Internet, type text, play solitaire.
Learning always comes in handy
Generally, in most prosperous countries, they combat unemployment exactly as described above. That is, they send people to study if they cannot provide them with work. Unemployment benefits are given only if you agree to attend state-funded retraining courses. However, this does not apply to persons with higher education. In Israel, for example, the so-called 'academim' are not forced to retrain. But if you do not have the appropriate diploma, be so kind as to sit at a desk. Some 'retrain' for years - the benefit is enough for a modest life, and over time you can get social housing from the state. At the same time, there are plenty of 'cash' jobs. Because in any country there is a fierce struggle between the population and the tax authorities. And so far the score is 1:1.
Unemployment also worries Germany. My German friend finished school, did not manage to get into university, and without a diploma no work is to be found. What to do? He found an advertisement for a technical college that guaranteed jobs for its graduates. The only difficulty was finding the money to pay for tuition. But you could study on credit: while you study, you pay nothing, and when you find a job, you 'fork over' to the college from each salary for two years.
And so he receives his coveted diploma, but the job placement people throw up their hands: where on earth are we to find that many jobs for all of you?! After all, we are in Germany, and we have unemployment! So they parted in peace. They sent him to look for work on his own, and he 'sent' them as creditors.
Some people solve the issue of acquiring a specialty differently. Those who cannot handle university attend courses or hire reputable tutors. With such an education, you can also live and, most importantly, earn money. Especially in the freelance system, i.e., being your own hired hand. This most often applies to the service sector, creative professions, and all sorts of stripping.
My Finnish acquaintance (a woman, not a knife) immigrated to the USA thirty years ago without a diploma and without knowledge of the language. All her 'universities' were nursing courses. Then she honestly worked until retirement (about $1,000) and left for warmer and cheaper climes - the Canary Islands - to quietly live out the rest of her life. The pension is transferred from the States to a Spanish bank. And the amount is more than enough for housing, food, and entertainment.
In other words: "Even if you are an old Negro, if you are a lazybones or a blockhead, your endeavors will not succeed in any country." Good luck to you, gentlemen!